Hi there. Thank you so much for checking my blog. Your continued support is really appreciated. As I look toward the end of the week I am reminded that my wedding anniversary is coming up. I cannot believe how fast time has gone. .
Let’s Catch Up
We’re going on 5 years of marital bliss and so much has happened since. Let me list the ways:
- I’ve given birth to two beautiful girls
- I no longer fit in my wedding dress as a result
- I found out that I can survive without sleep when necessary
- I love being at home
- My body has done for me and my girls than I ever thought it could
- I have tiger stripes also know as cellulite
Honestly, much more has happened but for the sake of this post I decided to focus on me. In case you missed it, what I listed are the changes in my physical appearance and it wasn’t by accident.
Physical Confidence
When I was younger I was really insecure about how thin I was. It was very common for someone to comment on my weight and my lack of it. I was very self-conscious about my butt, I was told it was too big. I cared about the length of my hair and how I never was able to retain any length. The list goes on.
Fast forward a few years and I finally see the beauty in my thin frame and every curve of my body. I began to appreciate the woman I saw in the mirror. It also helped when Tyra Banks reposted one of my selfies…good times. But then I got pregnant.
I knew the weight gain would be temporary and I was expecting a speedy weight loss because I had a plan. I remember the night when I realized that I had nothing in my closet that fit. I wasn’t making a lot of money so it’s not like I could’ve gone on a shopping. I sat down on my bed and I began to cry. My husband came in and consoled me. He reassured me that I was still beautiful in his eyes but at that point it didn’t matter.
Postpartum
Once I had my girls, I was grateful for their health and while I was savouring every part of motherhood, I began to miss my “normal” body or what I grew accustomed to be my “normal” body. I found myself bumping into things. I was becoming clumsy.
My knees were beginning to hurt doing simple squats and lunges. I really hated that. I was feeling aches and pains that I wasn’t accustomed to. I also couldn’t fit into my clothes and my size had gone from 4 to 14 within the span of a year. I found myself shying away from anything that didn’t stretch or hide from my tummy. This began to hurt my confidence.
How was I going to get my sexy back?
Journey to Sexy
First I had to realize that sexy isn’t based on size but on self confidence. My husband still finds me attractive and so it’s not coming from him. It’s all internal. I needed to shut that voice up and counter it with the truth. Here’s the truth:
- My body birthed 2 babies
- my body fed 2 babies
- my body can move
- my body continues to surprise me and allows me to overcome any challenge thrown at me
You see my body wasn’t the problem. My mind was. So I decided to start working out. I started buying work out clothes. Cute ones that would brighten my mood. I started participating in challenges that forced me to put on makeup and get dressed. I even started buying clothes that fit and shows off my figure.
Now here I am loving my body for what it is. I mean why not? My husband doesn’t have that issue.
Have you felt this way before?
Sandy Esprit 
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