Spring Clean Your Circle

Hi there. Thank you so much for checking out my blog. Today, I will be doing things a little differently.

I believe that part of living my life has always included my faith in God. As a Christian woman who grew up in a Christian home, I have always been told to forgive and forget. I saw many loved ones get hurt over and over again following this advice. Some of them have been abused and traumatized and had it not been for the grace of God, I believe that I would be continuing the cycle of abuse. I am not a professional and I do believe in therapy. I believe that there are some things that prayer alone can’t fix. Especially when dealing when traumas that continuously interfere with your ability to enjoy YOUR life. I capitalized your because sometimes it’s easy for us to become so influenced by other people’s counsel (even though they mean well) that we lose our identity in other people’s validation. I urge you to seek professional counselling if you’re ready to change but find yourself unable to.

The other day, I was sitting in the living room by myself, (time alone is a gift from God, Himself!) watching the Baby-Sitters’ Club television series on Netflix. I used to read the books as a child and so watching this show brought back all the nostalgic feelings of my childhood. As I watching, I noticed that one of the characters, Kristy, was so annoying. When I was younger, I felt connected to her the most. We were exactly alike with similar familial circumstances. I could relate to her. But looking at her now, as an adult I realized something. She wasn’t assertive, she was mean. She needed to be in control all the time, regardless of who she hurt. She meant well, but her desire to control everything just left a bad taste in my mouth. It wasn’t until her character started freaking out about her absentee father that all the pieces fell together.

I was Kristy. I wasn’t a nice person and had a desire to control everything so I could control the outcome. That way I could avoid being hurt. I carried that way of living well into my adult years. I had developed a coping mechanism to avoid being hurt over and over again.

Once I got married to my husband and had my daughter, something clicked. Call it an epiphany, call it a revelation but something happened. I needed to change because I was not the same girl anymore. I didn’t want to be the same girl anymore. I was a mother who had to teach my daughter how to live a beautiful and fruitful life. But how do I that? I didn’t want her being like me. I wanted to be assertive, decisive and kind so she could take over the world without being selfish or mean. That’s when I had a conversation with myself, which is quite easy to do when you don’t have many friends to begin with. This mostly took place in the spring. That’s when I began spring cleaning my circle.

I started by loving me. I began to identify all the ways that I could love myself and affirm who I was as a human being. It’s important for my children to be loved by a parent who is full of love. I don’t need the validation of others to be amazing at being me. I need my daughters to feel the same way. I’m not perfect but I love myself the way I am.

Then I started showing up as the woman that I wanted my daughters to look up to. Like I said, I know I’m not perfect but that doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of improvement. Accidents happen and that’s ok.

I would say the key to my revolutionary spring cleaning was learning to set boundaries. There are comments that I hear from loved ones that I just let slide because, in all honesty, I don’t feel like censoring the elderly all the time. However, there are comments that I will censor. I will not tolerate comments that disrespect me or my family. I have the right to refuse and to remove negative and toxic speech from being spoken in my presence and the presence of my children. Words are very powerful and have a way to carry over well after the moment has passed. For years, I carried words spoken to me in my heart. These words were hurtful and manifested themselves into my life in a negative way. I will not be the access for this kind of behaviour for my girls. My hope is that they are led by example and they too, will set boundaries and develop a strong voice to advocate for themselves when I can’t.

Another part to setting boundaries, for me, was cutting off toxic family members. Some family members just happen to drift off and lose contact and that happens. Life happens and we all have our own families to care for. However, those that have continuously caused hurt to me personally without a change in behaviour, I no longer entertain. It is important to me that I stay healed. Forgiveness is hard enough the first time, but after a while it becomes debilitatingly oppressive. After living like that for years, I believe that the next course of action is to be free and to stay free. It’s not easy. In fact, it’s really hard. A lot of people don’t understand why I have chosen to go this route. But for the first time in my life, I’m advocating for myself. My voice is being heard. I don’t have to resort to controlling everything and, honestly, it feels good.

Whoever you are, if you find yourself just stuck and constantly feeling hurt, believe me it will get better. You have a voice and it matters. Speak up and get help. You may find yourself alone but it’s better to be alone and free.

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Eczema skin relief toddler edition

Hi there! I want to start off by saying thank you so very much for joining me here. I know that you could be doing anything and you are here. I appreciate that a lot. Just to let you know that this post may contain affiliates links. If you want to support me as a content creator, by all means purchase through the links provided in the post. You will never pay more, but you may save some money. At the same time, I will get a small commission. It’s a win-win for us both.

When my eldest daughter turned 1 year old, I started to notice a rash developing in the back of her knees going upwards toward in backside. So I did what any mother would do and turned to Google. Of course, after many blood pressure raising self diagnosis, I knew the right thing to do was to see what the doctor had to say. She reassured me that it was eczema and it was common and nothing to worry to about. Which is easier said then done when you’re watching your baby scratch herself to the point of bleeding.

Sometimes a headband is all you need. If your little is really against getting her hair done, a nice accent will do the trick. Here Mercy is wearing a white stretchy netted wide headband with a white blooming flower to the side.

Her symptoms were pretty standard. Her skin gets dry every winter and I mean really dry to the point that her skin gets really rough. She starts scratching like crazy and the rash appears. We got a prescribed ointment for the rash but unfortunately it doesn’t take away from the dry skin and itch.

After many attempts at find a treatment that works, I finally turned to Instagram to get some help from the mom community and they did not fail me. Some of the ideas shared with me I had already tried, some I did not and the ones that worked for my girl I still do now.

My main concern was getting her skin to behave like her skin should. For those of you who don’t know eczema is also know as atopic dermatitis. It is a condition that makes your skin red and itchy. It is thought to be due to a “leaky” skin barrier, where the skin is not holding in the moisture as it should causing it to be dry in the process. It’s also thought to be a immune system response to an allergy. Of course, you should seek a medical professional for a proper diagnosis.

The most common response I received was the Aveeno Eczema Care Itch Relief Balm. I purchased the Aveeno cream from Amazon because it was the most convenient way to get it. I’d rather have it shipped to my house than to dress the whole family to go outside in the dead of winter. The balm is quite thick but applies nicely. It doesn’t linger on the body as much either. I find that it’s best for us to use it at night right she’s had her bath. It’s fragrance free, so that’s a bonus.

I also received SKN Moisture Retention Healing Face + Body Bar which I use on her body nightly during bathtime. This company is Black owned which is why I’m so hype about them. They are based in the United States but they do ship to Canada. I was overcome with their generosity and couldn’t wait to try their bar. The bar foams really easily and smells amazing. It’s the perfect way to calm my daughter. According to the site “This bar helps to treat eczema, psoriasis, dermatitis, and dry skin. It is infused with 5% Colloidal Oatmeal which is also an all-natural skin-soothing solution for bug bites, sunburns, poison ivy, and other itch and inflamed skin conditions. This bar is also infused with Eucalyptus oil that is great for wounds and skin infections; thanks to its anti-inflammatory effects” and I cosign this. I highly recommend anyone needing an alternative to commercial based soaps to check them out.

The results were night and day. Her skin felt like skin again and you would never know she had been scratching herself if it wasn’t for the scars. I was so impressed by both products. Her skin was once again soft. She doesn’t scratch anymore and my girl is no longer bothered by itchy skin. I’m a happy mom!

Have you dealt with eczema? What have you used?

HI My Name is Sandy

Hi there! Happy New Year! I want to start off by saying thank you so very much for joining me here. I know that you could be doing anything and you are here. I appreciate that a lot. Just to let you know that this post may contain affiliates links. If you want to support me as a content creator, by all means purchase through the links provided in the post. You will never pay more, but you may save some money. At the same time, I will get a small commission. It’s a win-win for us both.

Lately, there’s been a few faces coming to my blog and I am so happy you are here. It is my pleasure to make your acquaintance. Whether you’re here for my life hacks, my skin care, hair care and/or thoughts on life I’m grateful that you’ve made the decision to keep visiting my blog.

A bit about me…

My name is Sandy Esprit. I am a stay at home mom and full time social media content creator. I have mothered two girls and am married. I love what I do and am very grateful that I get to live this life. Of course I’m giving you the short form version of my life because well I always wanted to hide my past. However I want my life to inspire others and that can’t happen unless I open up that Pandora’s Box.

Into My Past We Go…

I grew up in a single parent home, where my mother was the sole bread winner. I understood the value of hard work and the value of a dollar. Growing up we didn’t have a lot growing up, but we always had food to eat and a roof over our head. It wasn’t always easy. In fact, my mother worked hard every day but at times it seemed like that hard meant nothing.

We never stayed in one place too long. I went through 13 different schools because we kept moving so much. I don’t have any childhood friends other than my little sister. Honestly, she’s my best friend by default. We were each other’s rock. I feared relationships growing up. I didn’t trust people. It was hard to open up and when I did I overshared.

I’ve been homeless at least three times. I’ve lived in a country illegally for a few years. I know what it’s like to suffer in silence. I had my first panic attack at the age of 13 and had to navigate it alone. There were times when I felt like I was put in situations where I was used as a means to bridge familial disputes. As a child, that’s not a situation that made me feel loved or appreciated.

But we got through it by God’s grace.

Here we are…

Eventually, my life levelled out. I went to school and graduated. I attended the University of Ottawa where I majored in Biochemistry and took a minor in music. I wanted to study music but I wasn’t allowed so I went with my second love, science. It took me six years but I did it.

I always wanted to help people and make them feel valued, like they could do anything. I hated that feeling of insecurity and instability. That became even more prevalent when I was pregnant with my first born. I loathed it and wanted to protect my daughter from ever feeling this way, which is why I started blogging.

I didn’t see anyone who looked like me articulating my likes just as much as my insecurities. Everyone looked so put together and well curated. Meanwhile I was hot mess. So, I became vulnerable and posted about my fears. It wasn’t always well received but I felt better owning my story.

People were relating to me. I was inspiring people get through their day-to-day and I wanted my daughter to see me as a woman instead of just mommy. Because one day they’ll be my age and they may face the same struggles I face today as a woman. They need to know that they’re not alone. Most importantly, they’ll be ok.

Open Letter to my girls…

To my dearest princesses aka my #girlsquad!,

Today is just another random day. We are going through the motions in hopes that it helps you become the best version of yourselves. I don’t know what kind of women you’ll become but before I start overthinking, I promise to do my best not to cry until after I’ve finished writing this letter.

You are three and one year old. You have a limited view on the world but that view is full of fun, exploration and most importantly love. You both live in a stable home and you have Mommy and Daddy at home. We both love you more than you could ever know.

I chose to write you this letter because I didn’t want to display my love for you as an event. I want you to know that I’m proud of you. I’m proud of you for making it through every single day with a positive outlook. I”m proud of you for teaching ME more than I could ever teach you about life. I’m proud of you for reminding me that life is more than just routine, a paycheck or a goal. Life is about living.

Thank you for teaching me that I am worth loving for the woman that I am and not for what I do. I’m not as confident as I appear and most of the time I’m going on a gut feeling and a whole lot of Jesus. I know that you will be ok no matter what comes your way but I am your mother. That part of me won’t go away until the day I die. Sorry. To answer your question, I won’t stop worrying about or be ready to kill for you and hide the body.

We won’t always get along. We won’t always agree. If I’ve raised you properly, then I can expect a challenge on pretty much everything I’ve taught you. You see, I want your respect and as much as I want your undying obedience,, that only belongs to God. I can’t have that.

Your job is to be you. The best version of you. That will be different depending on the day. Some days you will thrive and some days you will learn. Some days you will need to cut yourself some slack and some days you will need to whip yourself into shape. Don’t worry, you will know the when and how. If you need help, I’ll be there to guide you the best I can.

I’m not perfect. I know it. Don’t rub it in. Neither are you so there! *that’s where you get your petty from, sorry!*

I love you is an understatement but it’s true. I owe you for teaching me to love and be patient and to be a better Christian is an understatement but it’s true.

There’s a lot that will happen by the time you read this open letter. But one thing will remain true.

I love you. Unconditionally. Inexplicably. Simply because you’re YOU!

5 Things (NEw) Moms Don’t want to hear

Hi there! I want to start off by saying thank you. Thank you for being you and for checking out my blog. You could be doing anything but here you are with me. I honestly appreciate your support.

As a mother of a 3 year and 1 year old, there are certain comments that I have heard and will probably continue to hear from others. For some reason, some people just don’t know how to speak to people and forget that mothers are human beings who just don’t need to be reminded that their womanhood is constantly being judged by society. So this may come off as a rant but I assure that my goal is to educate and hopefully help you be more sensitive to your new mom friend or loved one. And if you’ve been on the receiving end of these comments, I know how you feel.

Mind you this may not apply to every mom you meet but most of it will. Also just because this new mom is your BFF or relative, it doesn’t make your words any less hurtful. Moms go through a lot and the last thing we need is to be reminded that we are not the way we were. Believe me, WE KNOW!

  1. You look tired! – Wow! I wonder what gave it away. How puffy my eyes are? The dull look on my face? The fact that the life and well being of my children depends on my being available 24/7 without any days of or reprieve. Or that no matter how hard I try to relax when someone actually decides to take care of my children, my brain won’t stop imagining the absolute worst case scenario to remind me that I am helpless when it comes to the constant worrying over my children’s life. Please just bring me coffee and shut up. It better be the good kind too and not that crappy cheap stuff too. Thank you!
  2. You should breastfeed/bottle feed/feed more/feed less– Unless you are ready to be put in your place, keep your comments to yourself. Unless you are a licensed health care professional with backed scientific knowledge that will greatly improve the quality of life for the child that I literally just pushed out of my vagina in the presence of the designated people just keep it moving. You can not out love my child. It’s not possible. When the baby was in my womb, the baby grew and thrived. This baby is my responsibility and until you see signs of neglect or abuse just don’t go there. My baby is fed and happy and thriving.
  3. You should do something with your baby’s hair– Says who?! Hair grows and falls out naturally. The state of my child’s hair is hardly cause for concern unless (again!) licensed health care professional sees an underlying medical concern that needs to be addressed. Hair comes and grows. Whether I put barrettes or braid his/her hair is not going to affect the state of my child’s well being. It’s better to raise happy children who are confident in the way they look as opposed to pleasing the society’s status quo as to what a child should look like.
  4. How come you’re not losing weight? – A mother’s body …let me rephrase a woman’s body is not anybody’s source of visual entertainment. Her body, her choice. Furthermore, mothers have a hard time accepting the new body she has obtained, for crying out loud, give her time to appreciate the level of efficacy at which her entire reproductive organs have worked alongside with the rest of her body to maintain her and another human’s life. The execution with such precision that she can and will do again (if God sees it fit) is enough to celebrate that without the scrutiny of some loose skin and excess fat. AND BY THE WAY, that excess fat is tremendously important in the well being and safe keeping of that baby during it’s time in the womb. Did you think she’d push it out along with the baby and the placenta?! Every woman is different and every journey is equally different. Just feed her and tell her she’s beautifully amazing because she is. Don’t forget the cookies!
  5. Enjoy it while it last!– I want to, I really want to but I AM TIRED!!!!! There’s not enough coffee to keep me sane during this time. I don’t sleep, my body doesn’t match what my brain says I should look like, my kids need me, my husband needs me, I need me and I look and smell like the swamp thing except I just reek of body odor. What’s to enjoy? Sleeplessness? Let me dial it back. Yes they are cute and yes I love them to pieces. Yes they complete a part of me that I didn’t know I had. I love it but let a sister vent without the condemnation. If you miss it so much you’d have a baby in your house right now, keeping you and your household awake too. But guess what? You know their cuteness is a trap just as much as I do. So how about we “enjoy” this frustrating moment of motherhood.

Looking back at this post I clearly had some underlying frustrations that I needed to release. Unfortunately, these comments usually come from people who mean well and actually are looking out for our best interest. That in itself is really annoying because it hurts more. You figure they would know better but turns out they don’t.

How do you think I got here?

Did I miss a comment? Let me know in the comment section.

5 (FREE) Tips to be Successful

Hi there! Thank you so much for being here. You could be anywhere but you chose to be here. I honestly appreciate your support.

Today is going to be a little different because today this post is going to piggy back off of my latest YouTube post. After seeing what we thought was impossible happen south of the border I think it’s safe to say that impossible has a whole different meaning.

You don’t need a whole lot of money to get started so here is the post!

Female Owned Canadian Businesses You Should Be Buying From

Hi there! Thank you so much for checking out today’s blog. I’m participating in NaBloPoMo this year and my goal is to actually go through with this challenge dutifully post (or have a post ready) daily. I believe that consistency is key to growth. Without it, there’s no real chance of success.

Back in June, there was a huge call for putting our money where allyship is concerned. I believe that part of being effective in the change of the way we view the Black community is to support the Black community. Whether it’s via sharing on social media or financially purchasing services and goods from them, anything is better than nothing.

With the holidays coming up we are all trying to find that special gift for our loved ones. I believe that there is no better time like today to support a Black Canadian business. In fact, most of the business I will be highlighting are owned by Black Canadian women. They all have stellar products that I personally enjoy using, from hair care to skin care to statement pieces that will light up your home or your outfit. So let’s get started with the list.

Earthtones Natural

Earthtones Natural is based in Toronto, Canada and if you’re a part of the curly hair community I highly recommend that you visit their website. Their site is a one-stop shop where you can purchase your hair products, get a hair consultation, see their webinar and so much more. I am personally in love with their Curl Condition line and  their Curl Enhancing Gelly Max has allowed my wash and go’s to last up to five days. I’ll never forget the day my hairstylist told me to keep doing whatever I was doing. Their products have greatly decreased the amount of time I spend on during wash days. If you’re serious about your hair journey or know someone that is, this is one company that should be on your radar.

Nagi Cosmetic

I remember when I first started wearing foundation, the only cosmetic companies that catered to women of colour were Iman, Bobbi Brown and M.A.C. If you couldn’t find your shade with these companies then you were out of luck. Later on, more companies started to include more shades but more as an after thought. Most make-up companies focus on the White sector first and then add darker shades later. However Gina Delisme, she just caters to us, women of colour. You don’t have to worry about being too dark, she’s got us covered. Not only is she putting women of colour first but she’s also a Haitian queen doing Boss things in Quebec. You will fall in love with the shade range made available for every melanin pigmented queen.

Tiara Adelaide Beauty

This might be cheating but I actually won her entire line from an Instagram giveaway and boy am I glad I did! Her liquid lipstick is on par with so many other liquid lipstick. It literally is transfer-proof, sweat proof, movement, like it literally will not move. It is the ultimate answer if you’re worried about your lipstick moving around while wearing a mask, it won’t. It is affordable so you don’t have to worry about breaking the bank.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBDo9u0nqVM/?igshid=4o0jfqo3a9yf

Anthonia Makeup

Anthonia is a stellar makeup artist and her brushes are a reflection of her work. They are so soft and make make-up application so easy. They are so easy to use and she makes it easy for the everyday person to feel like rockstar make-up artist by providing us with a card that shows what each brush does. Her make-up brush will make any make-up artist feel great regardless of whether you’re a novice or a seasoned veteran.

Kokemoi

If you’re looking for simple jewelry pieces or accessories that make a statement then look no further. Kokemoi offers some exquisite pieces that don’t break the bank and create a certain air of sophistication no matter what your wearing. I personally bought some pieces from Kokemoi and I wear them regularly. They make a great gift. If you so choose to purchase from them use the code SANDY40 and save 40%. You’re welcome.

A Thousand Moods

I have a whole blog about how I feel about their Body Melts, so I’m just going to leave the link here, for you to click. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4gsWCzULJ0&t=2s

To save that I love this company is an understatement. Their skin care product is luxury for the skin. It will literally melt once it touches your skin. And their candles are made to fill the room with a pleasant that doesn’t overpower your senses and their look is more of an accent to a room. It honestly upgrades the look and feel of a room. Many times, I’ve lit up their candles just to help stay focused on the task at hand. Now that they’ve got their Christmas stock ready, I’m so excite to shop their stuff.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CHDy2oHFIoV/?igshid=14bee24e3cpjw
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This is my list for now. Did I miss any? If so, let me know in the comment section.

Why Johnsons Cottontouch Baby Lotion Is My Bedtime Secret Weapon

Hi there! Thank you so much for checking out my blog today. I really appreciate your support and believe me, I am really grateful you took the time out to read this blog. Some of the products displayed on this blog have been gifted to me and this post may contain affiliate. If you choose to buy from these links you won’t pay extra, you fact you may even save money. I’ll get a commission which will keep this blog going. However, all opinions expressed are completely my own.

By now you’ve heard of the Johnson’s Cottontouch baby lotion which was a part of their massive rebranding launch back in 2018. If you’re a mother to a baby or a toddler, then I’m sure you’ve heard of this lotion unless you’ve been living under a rock. This lotion is designed and formulated with newborns in mind. This is great for their sensitive skin. This newborn face and body lotion is extremely light, has a very thin consistency, almost milk-like. It absorbs extremely quickly into the skin and provides 24 hours worth of moisture.

The whole idea behind Cottontouch is that from the moment they are born, you can from that connection with your new babythrough touch. Touch is so important as it is one of the most powerful way to form that bond.

However I didn’t realize how much I would love this lotion for not just my baby but for both of my girls. Aside from the fast absorption and it’s ability to provide moisture without causing my girls’ skin to have a reaction, the fragrance is what makes this lotion so worthwhile. It’s also the reason why a year later after the birth of my baby, I am still using this lotion on her.

The lotion smells like cotton and it is so soothing. When I get my girls ready for bed the most important thing is to avoid anything that can stimulate them. I’m trying to avoid stimulation because by the time bedtime rolls around this mama is tired. I need to wind down myself.

Since the first time I’ve used this on my girls, the smells instantly lifts my mood. It’s therapeutic in a way. I apply it to their body and I see them smile because we’re usually talking about the day and I’m doing a silly face. It is a part of our bedtime routine.

I love that it doesn’t leave my hands sticky or heavy. It doesn’t matter how many pumps for lotion I use my baby’s skin is soft and moisturized and so is my hands. It’s perfect all season long.

Is there a bedtime staple that you can’t go without? Let me know in the comments.



*LIKETOKNOW.IT SANDYESPRIT

*GRENADE USE PROMO CODE SANDY

*PERSONA NUTRITION SANDY50

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Being A Black Mother in 2020

Hi there! Thank you so much for checking out my blog. Your support is greatly appreciated and believe me I do not take it for granted. This post does contain product that I’ve received for free but it does not change how I feel about them. All opinions expressed are simply and honestly my own.

I was once asked to write about what it’s like being a Black mom. At first, I wasn’t ready to dismiss this as a topic because I just didn’t want to face these issues, in all honesty. I thought no one would care about what I had to say on the matter.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that my experience as a Black mother actually differs quite drastically, especially when compared to my Caucasian counterparts. As a Black mom, a first generation Haitian, living in a Eurocentric based society built off of systemic racism, there are just certain things that Black moms have to do differently or approach differently for the well-being of their children.

Disclaimer: This is not an anti-white blog posts, I am just listing my experiences as a Black. I would like to add that I am very proud of being a woman, being Black and being a mother. I wouldn’t change any of this for anything in the world.

For starters, here a list of things I heard growing up. Usually, these would be a series of conversation starters that would be followed by a lecture or a series of instruction.

  1. “You have to work twice as hard to make it in the world…”
  2. “If the police approach you…”
  3. “Some people won’t like you because of the colour of your skin…”
  4. “Your body is perfect just the way it is…”
  5. “Driving While Black”
  6. “You are not allowed to be angry”
  7. “No matter how successful, you will be seen as a threat…”
  8. “Black fathers do exists…”
  9. “Be careful if you speak out, you will be seen as aggressive…”
  10. “Not all of your Caucasian friends are anti-racist…”

These are moments that I have experienced that I know I will have to prepare my children for. There will always be a reason for people to be evil. I do believe in a better tomorrow. I am hopeful but I am also very cautious. After all, I am a Black mom.

Most mothers that I know, are naturally protective of their young. It’s instinct. It’s primal. It’s biological. Often times, as moms, we do everything we can to ensure that our children are well cared for and have all the tools necessary to thrive in this world. Unfortunately, for us BIPOC it involves having the race talk way younger than we would. It means having to explain to them that no matter how nice, polite or pleasant they are they will be seen as a threat. Especially, if they are males.

I don’t want to be that helicopter parent that is constantly hovering her children. But based on the media coverage of the brutalization and blatant murder of our own, I am becoming more and more skeptical. Things are starting to make sense and I am becoming aware that as adults we have a choice to make. At times, speaking up in the workplace as a BIPOC is seen as being hostile and creating a toxic work environment.

I can remember the countless times that my body was sexualized before I even knew what that meant. If I was picked on I had to just deal with it, because being called a racial slur was “kids being kids”. My hair had to be “presentable”. The police isn’t our “friend” and it’s better just to avoid them all together. Being gaslighted is a normality that I didn’t realize was abnormal until recently.

This is NOT the world I want my kids to grow up in.

They deserve better. So much better. That is why I’ve decided to become a stay at home mom. I wanted to teach them my way. I wanted my daughters to have the space to be exactly who they are meant to be. They can be fearless leaders and speak their minds with respect and understanding. They are safe at home to be themselves and not just another minority.

They can learn their history as it was and not the white washed or nitpicked version of whatever the world says it is. Furthermore if we don’t know where we’ve been, we won’t know where we’re going.

I truly believe that if I want to see the change, then change must start at home. In short, being a Black mom is like being a mom. A mom who is a Black woman who has faced prejudice at school and in the workplace. A mom who has experienced hate before she could even introduce herself. A mom who’s had to bite her tongue to preserve her child’s innocence. A mom who’s tired of seeing another hashtag pop up on her timeline, knowing that one day in the near future I will have to explain what those names mean. A mom, who’s had to accept disrespect from others to avoid creating a “toxic” work environment or to keep her job. A mom who’s been told to go back where she came from, got slapped in the face and that day was ready to lose her job. I know I will have those conversations with my girls. What will I tell them? I don’t know.

That’s my experience as a Black mom.



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*GRENADE USE PROMO CODE SANDY

*PERSONA NUTRITION SANDY50

*AMPLI CASH BACK AMPLI5