How to be the “perfect” wife

Proverbs 31 being the standard, 
makes it seem very hard to be the perfect wife. When I  got married I thought that I could be this proverbs 31 wife. Two years in, I’m still trying to achieve that goal. It seems like the more I remain married the harder it seems to achieve that goal. I’m not sure what it is but the goal line just seems to get further away. 

 As I was listening to Pastor Smokie Norful sermon “Roles of A Wife | Rules of Engagement”, I knew there were key characteristics I was forgetting to implement in  my quest to be that perfect wife. 
What I think he wants

• An on call chef

• business mogul

• a supermodel

• A maid

• A nurse

• A psychologist 

• A fitness model

• Be always happy

• never finding faults

• happily fixing issues that arise

• readily taking huge leaps of faith
What I want to do is be the picture of a perfect wife but the truth is most of the time I’m busy being my version of a perfect wife, not what my husband needs but what I think he needs. What he wants 

• A woman of faith

• prayer warrior

• his caretaker

• BACK him up

• respect him


Let’s be honest his perfect wife and my perfect wife are two very different people. In fact, if I was smart I would just focus on being his perfect wife. What he wants aligns with the word of God, so why not be just that? 

I know why I don’t do it. I  don’t do it because I don’t see how giving him what he wants takes care of our bills, my needs or our dreams. What I do see is, my version of being that perfect wife isn’t making things better either. In fact, it’s making it worse. So I might as well be his perfect wife. My version sucks and nobody wants her. I don’t even know why she’s in the picture. She’s terrible and doesn’t exist. I don’t even like her, I don’t know why I want to be her.

I’ll go back to being me. I am his perfect wife, that’s why he married me. 

Have you struggled being “perfect”? How did that go?

One response to “How to be the “perfect” wife”

  1. Chantelle Point Avatar
    Chantelle Point

    All the time. It is indefinitely a life long journey. But so worth every struggle, every disagreement, every challenge, and every reward.

    Liked by 1 person

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