If you could be….

I remember being a sassy, blunt, talkative but hard to get 5 year old girl. I liked this boy, he knew it but I made sure to never let it be shown in public. To be honest I don’t know why I did that. 

I remember being 9 years old and I knew that as an adult I would have a music career. I’d be a singer, songwriter, pop star extraordinaire with a university degree. Why? Because my message would be, “I’ve got the intelligence to do anything but I  choose to sing.” To this day I don’t know where I got that mindset from.

Fast forward to present day Sandy.  My 5 year old and 9 year old would be quite impressed with the way I carried out the mission. I’m the singer with the degree, the house, the husband and a beautiful girl and yet it’s not enough. I’ve accomplished it. I’ve done it. I’m that woman I pictured myself to be. I’m the woman I dreamed of myself to be and honestly it feels great. So why isn’t it enough?

Simple. I’m so busy being an “adult” now that I don’t get to live. I don’t get to be the sassy, truth hitting, talkative and super confident human being because I’m too busy being that broke chick, the imperfect daughter, wife and mother and financially irresponsible person. When I view myself in that light, all I see are my inadequacies, my inabilities and my failures, when in reality I’m the complete and total opposite. 

So I’m going to be me. That inner child of mine knows a lot more about who I am than the “socially constructed” version of myself.  

Be who you are meant to be.

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