Sandy Esprit

For the longest time, my body felt like a project. Something to fix. Something to shrink. Something to “get back.” I went from a size 8 to a size 14, and for a while, that number felt like it was shouting at me louder than anything else in my life.

I kept trying to lose the weight. I tried the tracking, the restricting, the waking up every morning with that heavy feeling of “Maybe today my body will finally behave.” But the truth is, my body wasn’t misbehaving — it was changing. It was adjusting to motherhood, to life, to stress, to joy, to survival. It was doing exactly what a mom bod does: adapting.

And honestly? I fought it for a long time.
My boobs went down, my belly stayed, and my butt said, “We are still here, hello.” Suddenly my proportions felt completely different. Some days I’d look in the mirror and wonder who this new woman even was.

But somewhere in the middle of that frustration, I started growing tired… not of my body, but of the pressure.

So I shifted.

These days, I still move my body 4–5 times a week — not because I’m trying to erase myself, but because I actually feel better when I move. I maintain, I strengthen, I breathe. Movement is self-care now, not punishment. And that shift alone changed everything.

Another thing that changed the game for me? Learning to dress the body I have now, not the one I used to have or the one I thought I “should” have. I started taking tips from my favourite style influencers like Antonia Fifi and Afiya Francisco. Women who understand shape, who understand style, who understand confidence at every size. Watching them taught me how to see my body as something worth celebrating — not something to hide.

Little by little, I started showing up as the woman I feel like on the inside, not the size on the tag. I let myself express my style again. I started playing with silhouettes, textures, colours. I leaned into clothes that honoured the shape I have today.

And something beautiful happened:
I started seeing myself again.

Not “pre-kids me.”
Not “when I get smaller me.”
Just… me.

This size 14 body is softer, stronger, and more lived-in than my size 8 body ever was. It carries memories and babies and lessons and late nights. It carries me. And I’m finally embracing her with the same love she’s always had for me.

This is my mom bod.
This is my womanhood evolving.
And this is me — showing up fully, boldly, beautifully — in the body I have right now.